You can't motorboat a personality
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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