Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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