Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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