I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
