Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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