Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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