She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
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using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
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She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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