my vag is so smooth its legendary
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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