I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
