Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
