I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
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And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
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Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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