no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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