Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize
