i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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