with your own penis?
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
