remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
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I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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