Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
