Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize