Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize