What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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