Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
