He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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