would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
They are going to name an STD after you.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
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