No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
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