people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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