You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
