I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
