there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
