Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
