How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
party gras won. party gras always wins.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
