You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I wish you could order shots online.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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