Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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