Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
