Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Randomize