are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
