I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
if only i could text you this smell
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
