In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
