i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
