Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize