It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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