I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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