I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
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I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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