drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize