I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize
