My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
