Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
