Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
