I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
