It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Be still, my beating vagina.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
