Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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