wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
